About 5 months ago, I signed up for an internet dating site. I know many people who have had success with it and figured it was worth the $60 for 6 months. It has been an interesting experience so far even though there has been no love connection.
I've communicated with several men. Some who had potential, others I found very attractive. Some few huge red flags, still others couldn't be interested in a short brunette without modeling credentials. And of all the men I've communicated with, I have only met one local guy in person. And he was soooo much cooler on-line.
First, there was K from Kansas. Very attractive, smart, funny, independent. For whatever reason, there was no connection despite our phone conversations. I have him as a friend and know that is all he will ever be.
Then there was P, a big time flirt who says all of the right things. His desire to be loved by a woman supercedes his love for himself. He abuses himself with food and work while hoping a woman will save him from himself. I hope he finds that woman before he self-destructs.
Most recently, I met J. He is a self proclaimed "Good Guy" whose biggest fear is that he will be rejected by a woman because he is a virgin. I was put off by the amount of selling he did of himself. His tactics of "I'm a romantic" and 'this is what I've done for other women' (flowers, candy, presents) did little to impress me. We had three phone conversations that amounted to "I think you're pretty. What do you think of me?" Even our on-line chats followed the same line. He tried really hard to sell himself to me. Sadly, I wasn't buying it. When he questioned what was wrong, I knew it was over before it even began.
Lastly, there is T. He is an attractive man from Ohio who likes my sense of humor and thinks I'm beautiful. We shared one on-line conversation that left me wanting more. It may be too soon to call it but I have a feeling he will not pursue me and that is what I hope for.
I want chemistry. I want a spark. I want a man I can talk with, not just to. I want depth and levity and sincerity and flow. I want someone who is real and not just a Wizard behind a curtain who tries to make me believe he is something more than he is.
My membership will expire soon and I have yet to decide whether I will renew. I know a "match" takes time but is this the right venue for me? Time will tell.
