Do we ever really consider friendship a gift? Or do we see it more as a right or obligation? And how close do we allow ourselves to get with our friends? I can answer that one by saying, for me, there are different levels of friendships. There are the friends who I happily answer their "How are you?" with "I'm fine" whether or not I mean it. Then there are those who ask the same question and I can tell them "I'm a little mental today" and they step up to the plate and offer a shoulder to cry on or Kleenex. And for those who have truly been blessed, there is the chosen one or two who are allowed into the inner sanctums of our hearts. The ones who don't even need to ask how we are, they already know.
I have a friend like that. She is my best friend. She is the one I laugh and cry with and expose my soul to. She knows my hopes and dreams, my desires and heart breaks. She lifts me up when I'm down and reminds me that God is in control, not me. Yes, she is honest enough to tell me when I am being hormonal and does so with the confidence that I will continue to love her for it. And even though we live in different states, every October, we meet at a Starbucks and talk on our cell phones over a pumpkin spice latte.
This best friend of mine is the reason I have a deeper relationship with Jesus. She is my inspiration, in fact. Short of Job, I don't think anyone in this world has endured all that she has yet still kept her faith. Over 10 years ago, she lost her oldest son to cancer - Non-Hodgkins lymphoma- yet she never stopped praising God for the gift of her son and the 7 years she was allowed to have him. Shortly after her son passed, she became involved in raising funds for cancer research to the point of going to Washington DC and addressing Congress. She organized Relay for Life events for several years. What amazing faith. What incredible love. That was Maureen. And I loved her.
On July 9th, after a very short battle with lung cancer, God called her home. She is survived by her parents, her 9 year old son, her brothers and sister... and me, among others. Sometimes, when I think about her, I believe God brought her into my life to teach me things like unconditional love, living a non-judgmental life, vulnerability, grace and forgiveness. I don't think I've fully grasped those concepts yet so He has to bring her back, right? Unfortunately, life doesn't work out that way and I am struggling to accept the idea that I will never see or hear from her again while I am on this earth.
But while there is some truth in that, I believe she is still with me. Times when I am not being the most gracious toward someone , I hear her say, "Susie, Jesus loves everyone." Days when all I want to do is cry, I see her dancing with her son in heaven and making others smile. And even though I am sad to know she won't be at my "one day" wedding, I can just see her sitting in a great, big, comfy chair next to God, playing matchmaker and offering to give up chocolate forever if He will finally send George Clooney over to me. That's my best friend, all right.
I can't understand how someone like Maureen who truly loved and praised her God could be taken from this world. Her life was a bright light that shone through even the darkest times. She was a disciple who went out to bring others to Christ. She touched so many lives in the process, especially mine. And I will never be the same.
Rest in peace, Maureen.
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